swan_bite: Anna eating some cotton candy and looking smug about it (Default)
* “the reichenbach fall” was beautiful. Ngl, as an SPN fandomer I was totally envious of the You-Know-What scenes, they were poignant and heartfelt and at no moment did I sense I was being manipulated. I felt like sending these episodes to Gamble and Co. and saying, “See here? This is how you send people off.”

* I exist in a continuous state of appreciation life Jared Padalecki and I respect his work as an actor, which I think has improved through the years, but the dude talks shit...or he sounds like an ignoramoose when he tries to excuse SPN's writers for their logic-defying fuckery. First of all, Castiel didn't hate Sam or dislike him or whatever the fuck he said about Castiel, and Sam does not hate or dislike him back. Just because an interviewer says, “X doesn't like Sam,” you don't have to say, “Well, Sam doesn't like X either.” Seriously. Also dude! Castiel as a god was not going to prevent SPN from having awesome plots and awesome episodes, mainly for Iron Man, Superman, Captain America, Hulk, Superhero reasons. Because you can have a super powerful being exist and still have conflict and danger. Really. What you can't do is make it abundantly clear that the boys will survive a nuke if they just get inside a fridge and that every single guest star is cannon fodder, a redshirt on Star Trek, a gay character in a drama, a child's pet goldfish, a poc in a scary movie, don't get attached guys, thisshowisabouttwobrothersandfuckcharacterarcsandjourneysandtherulesofscreenwritingorwritingingeneralforreasonshavingtodowithreasons.

* Did I enjoy Time After Time? yes I did. But like everything in SPN these days, I have my reservations. I LOVVVVVVVVVEEEEEE Veronica Mars season 1&2, because it is made out of amazeballs and awesomesauce with a cheery of epic on top, and a good part of that epic and amazeballs was the Veronica/Logan chemistry, which was Jared&Jensen proportions of wonderfulness. and so I expected a lot more Dohring than I got. Yay! Dean being a fanboy in a fedora, but woe! Dohring is sarcastic, bitter, and wittily hilarious given the right dialogue and what do we get instead? A bland, sappy semi-powerful god who told the bros that their title sequence was a representation of their future. Which, yeah. OTOH, yes, fanboy Dean in a fedora. :D Hawt like fiah.

*Megaupload just got busted, guys. Get ready because the zombies are coming.

Winter Reading Part Deux
(most of these fics were found through pianoforeplay and unfitforsociety, so thanks, dolls.)
Read more... )
swan_bite: Anna eating some cotton candy and looking smug about it (puppy & his dog)
* RIP you gorgeous dog. i'm trying not to think about this too much, i can't really process animals dying.

* what i look for in fanfic in general terms. these are generalizations, because --as we all know-- a good writers can seduce us into making plenty of exceptions despite or worst or better judgment.

* in poetic terms what i look for in fanfic: between the shadow and the soul )

emotional exhibitionism, the need to Hollywood it up and seek public validation, or validation from certain people, the belief that your love ain't enough until you go to a dinner and have people clap as you tilt and kiss? squicks me quite as much as the squickiest thing you can think of. like a chan scat watersports noncon OOC fic. because it's reality tv masquerading as fanfic. my favorite fanfic authors do not take their inspirations from the Jersey shore or the Kardashians.

* i thought [livejournal.com profile] fleshflutter was coming back. it's taking longer than i expected and i'm not enjoying the wait. i also miss [livejournal.com profile] squishyball. *HOLDS UP A BOOMBOX* *IN YOUR EYES THE LIGHT THE HEAT IN YOUR EYES I AM COMPLETE*

* i totally missed the trenchcoat! how could i miss it? well, i had less than an optimal experience watching the show yesterday. i rudely invited myself to an SPN chatroom with [livejournal.com profile] angel_kink while she was less than inclined to discuss a show she's currently boycotting with me, for obvious fucking reasons, and proceeded to ignore me while talking about Carnivale, which she warned me was "slow but brilliant." i then left having realized the error of my ways, and it kind of shaped my opinion of the episode, which has been somewhat redeemed in my eyes with that day-after perspective one gets after the pounding headache of the hangover has abated. the pretty wincesty gifs in tumblr didn't hurt. who knew that tumblr was going to turn into my source of canon-squee. it's still no more than passable, but it's not poo (as i told [livejournal.com profile] drunkcascookies yesterday).
swan_bite: Anna eating some cotton candy and looking smug about it (emotionally yeeeeeessssssss :()
since i've been in fandom 3 writers have deleted their lj. today [livejournal.com profile] fleshflutter during the summer [livejournal.com profile] leonidaslion (who luckily left their AO3 (but it's not the same as an LJ --the commentary, the reviews, AO3 is just not as interactive)) and before that [livejournal.com profile] yourperiphery.

i've never been in a fandom where so many of its authors delete their ljs. i'm not saying it's not cool to delete your journal, i never would...and fanfic writers don't owe anybody anything, and there are perfectly valid reasons for not wanting to leave fanfic around or delete your journal, or do whatever you want just like the rest of us, but just--


it's sad. like a little death. =/ i hope it's just temporary. i hope that if it isn't temporary it's not because any RL or online problem.

i wish her well.
swan_bite: Anna eating some cotton candy and looking smug about it (peace and fu)
I tried to make this spoiler-free and as general as possible while talking about it, but I'll put it under a cut if you feel it IS spoilerish.

* I didn't hate it. lol
* I do wish fanfic writers could have written the episode, though, because it was a good episode, well-acted, beautifully shot, with gorgeous lingering scenes, but
* There were moments when I felt like I was being manipulated into siding with Dean.
* Like if I didn't say, "Leave him alone, he shouldn't feel guilty about all this shit" then what I was saying was that I wanted him to die and that he was
* 90% shit. Strawman. That is not my argument.
* He's not irredeemable. He's not a waste. He's a beautiful, flawed, broken man.
* But he's not guiltless. He was guilty, just not of the things he seemed to feel guiltiest about.
* Dean does not get a free pass, though.
* He does look beautiful when he cries, he does look gorgeous all emo.
* The scene where he was psyching himself up to be with Mia was priceless,
* because I love that he's not really macho posturing Dean Winchester any longer.
* I know what you're thinking, that I'm just pissed about the Castiel thing.
* Actually, I think they went for J. because that was culturally acceptable, sensitive in the right way.
* You can show your love and need for a woman, specially once she's dead.
* It also painted Dean as a tragic romantic hero, gives him a cute, blond girl to stroke his cheek, lets him lean into one small long fingered manicured hand again. Which he does so well. Hopeless yearning fits him better than leather.
* Emotional manipulation doesn't bring out my nesting or motherly feelings though. You're barking up the wrong bitch.
* Dean does need to move on, but
* Amy was an episode ago,
* Castiel was two.
* Moving on this quickly would be heartless
* Callous
* Emotionally stunted
* Indifferent
* Cruel
* The bodies are not cold yet so
* Feel the burn when you swallow that whiskey guilt taste, Dean.
* ;D

That's my opinion. Don't know if it's unpopular or not, and I don't want to say it is because whenever other people say "unpopular opinion" I usually think "1. It's not an unpopular opinion, 2. aren't you the special snowflake with special unpopular snowflake opinions."
swan_bite: Anna eating some cotton candy and looking smug about it (starfighter heart eyes)
1. My Flist is talking about Mary Sues again! Which seems to be really necessary, because people keep missing the point which is, DO NOT USE THE TERM MARY SUE AS ANOTHER WAY TO DISMISS FEMALE FICTIONAL CHARACTERS. (Also, stop using the term to deflect the potentially sexist reason you ((yes, and I)) may have to hate a female fictional character. 'Cause I may hate a fic girl for a good reason, for a sexist reason, or for a good and sexist reason, but saying "She's a Mary Sue" may stop me from examining my reasons, and my prejudices and may slow my process in becoming slightly less faily).

2. Was going to look at a 7.4 promo thingy despite my former claims of spoilerphobia, but when I clicked on the play button and Sera's face apparitioned on my screen-- dear lord, it was like someone had just peed on my Krispy Kreams. you know how sometimes you don't like a certain fandom person, because they are like the nails scrapping a chalkboard of your Fandom life? and them you come across them in some comm or on yr dash? this is how I feel about about Sera. Just looking at her makes me feel sour, and this is not a good feeling. She's to me what Bucky fucken' Dent is to the Red Socks. Sera Fucken' Gamble. (I don't dislike her as a person. I dislike her writing and her decisions and how she blithely confesses not knowing what characters she is responsible for would do in X and Y situations. The way she works, to me, reflects a lack of respect for her audience. Aaaaaaaand I say all this because I am conscious of how this appears, defending fictional girls and criticizing a Real Life Woman in a position of power in the same post. C'est la vie, I'm snarky enough to shrug and wish she didn't suck so I didn't have to say she sucked.)

3. Nevertheless I was somewhat spoiled by a friend and apparently spoiler )

4. Got this from the tumblr Slaughterhouse90210 “She hated the nameless women in stories, as if they lived and died so that men could have metaphysical insights.”
—Chad Harbach, The Art of Fielding

Sound familiar? huh? huh?

5. CONGRATS WORLD, BECAUSE YOU ARE CURRENTLY GETTING A NEW HAPPY AND FABULOUSLY HAIRED, POTENTIALLY MOOSEY ADDITION! In other words, congrats Gen and Jared. It's awesome when awesomeness comes together to create more awesome. As God, the first slasher told Adam and Eve when he got them together in that Garden, go forth and multiply. Or at least, practice. (makes perfect bbs).

6. Since we're talking about het (^ look above) lemme talk a little bit about this het fic read I read with future!Cas and Anna, and if anybody wants a look at it, i'll even scrounge up the link. Anyways, I was reading the fic, because my love of Jane has made me so much more open to het pairings (I always was okay with them, but I seldom went out searching because heterosexuality is so pervasive and fandom was like this breeze of non-heteronormative air or whatever, which I need less and less as more and more girls who are aware of queerness, aware of feminism, just, you know! aware write fics with girls with boys in ways which that are as transgressive as m/m or f/f ((and sometimes m/m and f/f or f/m/f or m/f/m fics are sadly not)) and I started weeping (inside) at how it could have been if we'd had Cas turn human instead of -- of-- whatever the hell happened. I could almost envision the barrage of bittersweet fic, when Cas realizes that if he wants to get from point A to point B he's going to have to do more than douche-squint, when he realizes his body needs sleep, sustenance, sex. When Dean starts looking at him differently because he IS different, himself yes, but a man also. Idk. They cheated themselves out of awesome canon and totally cheated us.

7. Comic rec: Starfighter. (look @ icon)

8. This year I read The Mind's Eye, Touching the Rock by Hull and now The Quiet Verse feels like a continuation. Jensen's written like a whole body listener, and while he's not ready to surrender to the silence (DO NOT GO QUIETLY INTO THE SOUNDLESS NIGHT!) neither is he bitter about it. For some reason, while familiar and instantly recognizable is well and good, imo fresh and original always makes things seem realer. ;D

9. Communities I'm excited about/currently lurking/stalking: [livejournal.com profile] spn_j2_bookclub, [livejournal.com profile] sd_recs, and [livejournal.com profile] hd_canon_fest (I'm not rly that excited about that one ((not because the comm sux, just that my fandom spirit has waned on h/d)) but I'm using it to get into the H/D mood for x-mass because I've read hd_hols fanfic for the past 5 years and not doing it again would be too, too sad.)

10. tumblr is no longer enemy #1. it's actually lifting my spirits on the whole Cas issue. I know, I accept the title of Fickle Hor and thank you for the crown, it's lovely today, but I may change my mind so stick around. It's so full of Castiel is the ambassador of awesome, trufax and OMG AVENGERS MY BODY IS SO READY/EVERYTHING IS JOSS WHEDON AND NOTHING HURTS, SURPRISINGLY ((UNLESS HE KILLS LOKI, THE BAAASTERD)) that I just click, let my clicker roam and smile. like this: :D. tumblr, bringing a smile to my face since 5 seconds ago though before that it made me want to kick puppies in the face. WHO KNEW?
swan_bite: Anna eating some cotton candy and looking smug about it (whatevs)
the good )

the bad )

& the ugly:
Image and video hosting by TinyPic

okay, not so much ugly as strangely compelling and sassy, but you get my drift.
swan_bite: Anna eating some cotton candy and looking smug about it (zombiefied mm)
\o/ lemme just say that i love when strapping young men cuddle each other like cats. for realsies, it's better than sex to me. xP shut up.

/o\ i have been trying to steer clear off any spoilers for S7-Supernatural because i'm worried i'll get my heartbroken and suffer horribly beforehand and during and then after. better to just suffer during and after, despite all rumors to the contrary i am not a masochist. i am apprehensive though. that dread horror movie feeling you get when you know shit is about to go down like Jason on the Titanic. i'm so scared for Castiel-- not necessarily that he may die, because who are we kidding here, this is Supernatural, Jesus's resurrection is nothing next to these biatches. but i am worried that they might ruin the character beyond repair and that Cas-haters will use shoddy canon to get their Cas-hateration on. anyway, i'm already prophesying evil stories in my head, i don't need hysterical commentary and spoilers to make it worst.

\o/ read "Feed" by Mira Grant, and are now even more obsessed than i used to be about zombies. i love apocalypse movies, books, comics. when i was a kid i'd watch and rewatch "The Plague" with Raul Julia and William Hurt like other kids watched "Goonies."

"Feed" is a near-future political thriller where bloggers are respectable journalists with government licenses & pack heat, the Zombie Apocalypse has actually happened, and we survived thanks to savior of mankind: George Romero. WHAT WOULD GEORGE ROMERO DO? there are quite a few zombies still walking the Earth ready to eat us, but we've got the proper technology to survive them, and we do just like we used to survive all the other predators that tried to eat us back in the day of caves and clubs and bows and arrows. in this AU, there are different types of bloggers: Fictionals (who write fic & poetry), Stewarts (who give you news/opinions), Irwins (poking crocks zombies is their specialty), and Newsies (they give you the news straight up, no thrills and frills). in the middle of all this are Newsie!George and Irwin!Shaun Mason, an intrepid brother-sister duo who have been chosen to follow a political candidate in the road to the presidency. it's a book for nerds. yeah, the zombies are a constant threat, but the science behind the infection is a big deal (OMG I FUCKING LOVE WORLD-BUILDING SO MUCH I WANT TO GAY MARRY IN IT IN NY) and so are the characters. in the end, it's not the zombies who are the real bad guys in this story... this is what i love about good sci-fi, how it puts things on a grand scale in order to magnify the little things without being twee or corny about them. love and living large and carpe diem are not that trite when tomorrow your granny might be munching on yr brain.

in a way it's also an issues book (politics/corruption, the integrity of the news & journalists, fame whores, the culture of fear, terrorism, the role of Religion without discernment in promoting wtfuckery, truth and how far you'll go to preserve it, etc.). but a well written issues book. like, it transcends the issues and is all about the story with those issues added in making it all better. not many nerdy, smart, fun zombie books out there and this is one of them.

two --er-- caveats? i don't even know what to call them, because i'm not really warning you about these things, like Shaun would never try to dissuade somebody from walking into a zombie-infested zone because he wouldn't wanna deprive you of fun-- but, just keep your head about you is all i'm sayin.'

uno- not gonna lie there's also a bit of a sam&dean type of relationship going on with cynical George and jaunty, wise-cracking Shaun which left me interested, and no, not in the porny sense. i just love rly intense claustrophobic relationships that don't have a smidgeon of health to them. because screw health on the missionary, i just want intensity, intimacy, the realization that these two people work because of each other and if one of them was to die the other one would be ruined without them. grand passion, you know, and all that.

dos- one thing that didn't quite jive with me was how George would pretend to be a Newsie when she really felt like a Stewart in her blog entries. not objective and free from opinion at all-- specially as the story progressed and she became closer and closer to the Republican candidate. (yes, Republican, but don't hold that against him. the world has gone mad, zombies are walking the Earth and a Republican candidate is actually kinda cool for some of the values of...). that might have been intentional though, i'm still thinking about it.
swan_bite: Anna eating some cotton candy and looking smug about it (jess likes it)
**idk if anybody's noticed but i've been on a bit of a hiatus! and not the kind of hiatus that means that Filomena is a partyin' ho with a really long dance card. oh, noes! Filomena has been studying and working and her life is a big workaholic mountain of poo. poo! FML. oh, and i'm talking about myself in the 3rd person which is totally a sign of major loserdoom and incoming depression.

***i am seriously loving USA shows, nerdy jewish doctors, suave bisexual conmen and their adorakable bisexual G-men, suits suits and more suits, notices that burn, guns and holsters, etc...well, except Covert Affairs. i know, i know. i really tried, and i wanted to love Annie, because idk if you guys know this amazing piece of information but Piper Perabo was a gorgeous lesbian in "Imagine You & Me" with the indomitable Lena Headey who is so hawtass that when people tell me Queen Cersei is a horrible bitch i say YES YES YES SHE IS DO YOU SEE THE HEARTS IN MY EYES THE PINK SPARKLY HEARTS?!?!? THEY ARE FOR HER BECAUSE I LOVE HER OMG! *runs around in circles* but yeah, Covert Affair sucks imo and if the CIA is that boring i'm going to have to stop using that as a come-hither line.

****i'm considering dipping my toes in the X-Men: First Class Fandom, but i'm sooooooooooooooo picky about exactly what i want that i think it'll just be an incoming avalanche of disappointment. after all, though the movie (i thought) did a good job of not being a Xavier or Magneto apologist, fanfic'ers already seem to be picking sides talking about "privileged" or "intolerant" or whatever. like, goddamn it, why can't you guys just leave stuff a little complex, ambiguous and not use fanfic as propaganda? when a movie about superheroes seems to be more nuanced than the meta on it-- idek, guys. this is why we can't have nice things or why i'm so freaking hesitant, either one.

*****i did somehow have time to read and not really like a few bigbang fics, but then again, i've purposely been leaving off anything that sounds truly good as a present for myself. like, umm, anything [livejournal.com profile] glassyskies has ever written and will ever write, 'cause that fierce bitch can do no wrong, and [livejournal.com profile] britomart_is 's big bang which I'm pretending was written for me, because j'adore Jess. yep, and though i have a hard time buying threesomes (they are usually graphic and not really passionate) Jess/Dean/Sam and any variation thereof is amazingly appealing to me in the right hands (like, the non-girl-hating hands? those hands) stfu, the woman has legs up to her armpits and she was clearly kickass. (in my mind canon, Jess is Girl!Dean and don't tell me that's not trufax, 'cause i ain't gonna listen.

*******if you haven't been reading "Captive Prince" I FEEL SO SORRY FOR YOU. SERIOUSLY. LIKE, OCEANS OF PITY IN YOUR GENERAL DIRECTION. yes, this is a rec. take this shit seriously, yo. it will change your life.

********also, damn you [livejournal.com profile] rhythmsextion for making me like football enough that i'm watching "Necessary Roughness" right now and thinking J2! J2! J2!
swan_bite: Anna eating some cotton candy and looking smug about it (talk to the ring bitch i'm the pope)
i was reading somebody's profile page (somebody in my flist) and it got me thinking about what being a fan means and what being in Fandom means to me. this is not a manifesto or an argument about how shit just got real and if you don't agree then you're wrong. this here? is just my opinion. caveat lector and all that.

i think that a fan who stops squeeing isn't really a fan, i think they would even tell you, "i used to be a fan, but--" but once a Fan becomes a part of Fandom then they be married the squee reel can be paused every once in a while...because the very act of looking for fanfic or fanart can mean that for that Fandom-Fan canon isn't enough. canon doesn't fulfill every need, sexual, psychological, cultural, social. and that's a type of criticism. isn't it?

the way some people are, if they are not cis, or white, or heterosexual, or male, or simply if their taste for media bifurcates from the mainstream, then the mostly cis, heterocentric, white male (a world that often even fails those people since individuals are not stereotypes) world of media is not going to work for them and they have to create a media AU within that world that does and that's Fandom. (which is why the people who just come here to read and write pr0n and could not give less of a fuck about anything else sometimes get angry when their search for pr0n is thwarted by other people's search for fan-made material that isn't blatantly ableist, racist, sexist, transphobic or homophobic.)

so to me saying "i don't allow for critique" is kind of ...naive? unaware? because if you write fanfic, or read fanfic, or fanart, you are acknowledging there's a lack in canon. which may be why fandoms are built where there's potential for more, potential for gay representation and female representation and PoC representation. we see that potential and that inspires us to seek it and create it and queer it and twist it and kink it and genderfuck it for our own little AU worlds where judgment is less valued than acceptance, tolerance. where morality is characterized by understanding and suspension of censure and stuff.

or maybe we're just here for the pr0n and i'm the naive, unaware one.
swan_bite: Anna eating some cotton candy and looking smug about it (the fauxcastle)
♥ Abed is my boifrend, and i'll fight you for him. y'all can take Jeff. \o/

♥ tumblr. i'm still not convinced. idk, bbs, idk. lj has given me rants and fanart and fanfic and hearts that beat all craycray like mine. tumblr has given me nothing, yet. i mean, other than letterstoCas which makes me feel sad/cathartic? but nothing that has made me squee and say, wow, this tumblr thing makes me want to bow down and worship it or be destroyed. meh

♥ can anybody rec me some AU Misha/Jensen High School fics? yes, i'm a dork, the thought of twinky Jensen and awkward hippy Misha sends me into my Aw-place and makes me happy. :D:D:D:D:D

Home Again read it. you'll cry, but it will be a good cry. i promise you.

♥ i don't really love Lisa, but people who hate Lisa make me wanna love her, just to counteract the fact that TV likes to create 2-dimensional female characters that make girls feel like they can't identify with female characters. bbs, realize it's not the vagina that is cockfan-blocking you, but the fact that you can't identify with poorly constructed characters who are not only half-cooked but who make you feel like being a girly-girl is trivial, that being an assertive girl is bitchy, that being a tom-boy means you'll die alone, that your lack of penis makes you inadequate. so you think that Lisa was a slut, who put her boy in danger to smoosh on Dean, think about the fact that she was written that way --at least superficially-- so that Dean could play house.

cut for hot mess of the fanfic rantish kind, look away, bbs, look away )
swan_bite: Anna eating some cotton candy and looking smug about it (shave my summer)
* "bitch" and c*nt (use of star to avoid possible triggers) are positive words to me. which is why, while i agree with the sentiment (Jared shouldn't have to worry about getting sexually harassed at cons) calling the woman who did it a "bitch" does not fly with me. at all. stop calling women who do something you don't approve of skanks and bitches. seriously.

* i've been watching "Community" to get to my happy place and omg, it's the best thing to happen to me since i found out that if you pour nutela in your Coke, the world may sneer at you and call you a teenage boy, but your life will be that much better. i need to find me some icons.

* this is epic ftw. i watched the vid yesterday --wait, was it the day before?-- morning and it made me cry my eyes out + grin like a loon all day. seriously beautiful. it's actually not that surprising to me. i've been called slurs (of the sexual orientation kind) in NYC (home of awesome people and rapist cops). never in the South and i lived in the South for a while and have only visited NY for weeks at a time at various stages in my life (because as i said, home of awesome people). (also ran into some trouble in Paris, which o.O, but there you go. being in a metropolitan area is no guarantee that you're going to be treated like a human being.)

* today must be my unbirthday (THANK YOU SO MUCH [livejournal.com profile] cherie_morte AND [livejournal.com profile] glassyskies ♥ ♥ NO WORDS, SERIOUSLY, NO WORDS.) :D:D:D:D:D:D

cut for Cas-based cryes bc no1curr )
swan_bite: Anna eating some cotton candy and looking smug about it (bunny)
in fiction, as in reality, what counts many times is not whether the two characters/people actually consummate their relationship either by words (you know, asexual romantic people) or by actions (sexy tiems!) but whether there is the great and on the edge potential for a romantic relationship.

if we claim we are all about “show, don’t tell” then Cas/Dean are certainly about that. i’m not saying that this is the only possible interpretation to the canon— I would never say that. yet, i resent the accusation that if i do see their relationship as romantic i am using my slash goggles. no, i am not. i am perfectly happy with seeing two men love each other without adding any sort of sexual element to the equation and some of the Dean/Cas stories i most adore are no more graphic than canon is (little touches & intense and/or loving looks). i do think there’s a romantic element to how Castiel thinks of Dean, even if sometimes i consider it one of the most gorgeous, tragic, unrequited love stories of all time. (not because Dean doesn’t return the love, but because he doesn’t recognize it for what it is.)

maybe it’s because i love epistolary love-stories (sometimes the characters have never seen each other when they’re already embroiled in a passionate love-affair; Griffin & Sabine, anyone?) and i ship Abelard and Heloise (Abelard was castrated, yikes! no sexing for them— also Francis/Claire? no sexing, loads of romance, though). for me, the sexual element is secondary to the great meeting of two souls that could be embodying any bodies at all. besides, in fiction, if it’s not ALL about the titillation and the hawtness and it’s a little bit about something else, then the sex is also a metaphor for “the profound bond.” just like “the profound bond” can then be a metaphor for sex.


reblogged as a reply to another meta post (by homoerotics) from my tumblr found here. (trust-you-less)

;D i can't promise i'll ever post anything of any sort of substance or whatevfuck, but if you have a tumbler i'd like to follow you. so, umm, tell me where it is, bbs? <3 ty!
swan_bite: Anna eating some cotton candy and looking smug about it (OH YEAH)
/o\ i wish that different people would audio the same fic. i get seriously turned off by certain voices. was listening to an audiofic for ~poisontaster and had to delete it, and it really sounded like the kind of fic i like-- but i just couldn't get into the voice/voice acting. am i the only nut who can't hear an audiofic if the voice doesn't personally jive? surely not. maybe this the sort of issue only really rude people mention and i'm being really rude without realizing. oh well. i wish audiofic'ers were less territorial/possessive about the fics they narrated, and there could be multiple recordings of fics. surely readers understand that they are not going to appeal to everyone.

/o\ was reading a fic and it started out marvelously. blind!psychic!Sam and Dean who doesn't know him, but needs him to find his father. loved the idea that there is more than one predetermined future ahead of us and that those who can see ahead (in fiction, because i don't believe in Ms Cleo-- YMMV) see more than one possible outcome. then at about chapter 4, gratuitous sexin' with no ratcheting up of tension, no building on connection, just abrupt let's get it on. had to quit reading after that because i was no longer interested. so annoying whenever authors plop down a sex scene (like shit from the sky, a smelly gift from the birds as it were) abruptly like that it feels like telling-intimacy instead of showing-intimacy.

\o/ read "The Wet Nurse's Tale" and thought the story was enjoyable. i seem to like loose women more than i do self-righteous prudes, even if one can claim moral superiority over the other one or whatever. probably my tendency to side with the sinner and side-eye the judge. which totally leads to why

\o/ people need to get off Cas's balls. seriously. Keep Calm and Get off his balls. (unless your name is Dean and you're trying to balance yourself on them. if that's true, then save a halo, ride an angel. you go, boy.)

\o/ i've come to the conclusion that it's not that i love Cas girls (after all, i am a Sam girl who mostly reads S/D) but that tend to hang with fangirls who

- have some sense of perspective
- don't hate all the female characters on the show
- don't confuse "Lisa is 2-dimensional" with "Lisa is a hor, i hope she dies" (creepy hypocrites)
- don't make every argument from the pov of character bashing/character stanning
- know how to share screen time
- appreciate the immortal trolly genius of Ben Edlund
- understand the difference between loving a character and excusing/justifying every action a character makes at the expense of every other character
- don't think of Cas as a BOYFREND stealer, interloper, usurper

i think it's because i had spent hours (marathoned the seasons like they were coke and i was Tony Montana) not years with the Winchesters before boy-angel came along. for me it was a welcome addition, for others it might have broken the tension of WE LIVE ONLY FOR EACH OTHER, WITH EACH OTHER, BY EACH OTHER. the claustrophobia of that relationship might have been something the Wincesters cherished. for me it was like, beautiful, blue-eyed, odd, socially awkward, Aspergers angel with wings? sign me right up. *shrugs*
swan_bite: Anna eating some cotton candy and looking smug about it (drama lama)
BOO for

*the argument i've seen going around of, "OMG CAS CAN'T YOU UNDERSTAND THAT DEAN DOESN'T CALL YOU EXCEPT WHEN ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY FOR HIS/HIS FAMILY'S WELL-BEING BECAUSE HE'S CONSIDERATE AND DOESN'T WANT TO INTERRUPT YOU WHILE YOU DO YR THING IN HEAVEN." because that's a load of bs. i mean, really? when one of yr friends is involved in a Perfect Storm of Poo you call them up, offer to help, even if there's nothing you can do. /rachel

* i was reading this J2 fic which seemed to look promising (wtf do i know) and i was a little iffy from the first (the style of writing was a bit o.O for me) but i'd read a Jared/Jensen fic in the past where Jensen was this homeless guy and Jared took him (that's believable as all hell to me) so i wanted to find a fic where Jared was the homeless guy and Jensen took him in (less believable/more of a stretch imo) but i couldn't stand the fic. i had to get the hell out of Dodge --almost broke my mouse backclicking-- because it was one of those OH WHAT HAVE I DONE! fics and apparently i have acquired some kind of allergy to the WHAT HAVE I DONE trope where one of the characters makes a mistake and spends the whole fic trying to make up for his oh so horrible mistake while the other character acts like a complete woobie. makes me want to slap people across the face with magic bricks. for real. like, i never realized how much i hated those kinds of fics and how manipulative they felt to me. ewwww. i'd rather read a chan scat watersport noncon mpreg fic. no, i wouldn't, but almost.



*Baby West being so chuckblessed adorable. OMG. already a scenestealer, i swear. ♥
*SPN CHAT. i had an awesome time last friday. those girls are cray-cray.
* Jensen living it up in a Ren-F and looking scrufftastically gorgeous. that kind of thing reminds me that actors are actually artists and that it's not just about the business.
* Jane Eyre being as awesome as i remember and more than i remembered.
* THE GREEN LANTERN stfu. i know. i know, frat boy doing his frat boy thing, idgaf. I LOVE THAT OATH, THOUGH. I LOVE IT. plus, Blake is really, really hawt in that coltish way that makes me want to see her walk and stumble and dress up her boyish body so that it looks kind of androgynous. *shrugs*
swan_bite: Anna eating some cotton candy and looking smug about it (THANK CHUCK FOR COLLINS)
\o/ saw "My Heart Will Go On" this morning because i had visitors yesterday, which sucked beyond belief. i was so looking forward to my very first SPN chat (usually i hang out at ONTD and abuse the hell of of gypsy's and squishy's gifs). alas it was not to be, and i had to watch it solo in the cold realistic light of a Saturday morning. :D the experience was a lot less fabulous than it would have accompanied by crazy squeeing bitches, but i still enjoyed the hell out Balzathar and --was it just me?-- or was Misha looking beautiful? pathos, suffering, lack of sleep look GORGEOUS on him. it is of my opinion, that Balthy ships Dean/Cas and tries to convince Cas to let him join in except that Cas has never gotten the courage to reveal his love and hadn't even thought of it/examined it until Balthy mentions it in passing, like it's a fact and congratulates him on his good taste because Dean "sure is pretty and if it was me I'd go back in time multiple times to hit for the first time all over again."

/o\ CAS COULD VERY WELL BREAK THE PLACE WHERE MY HEART IS SUPPOSED TO BE. i'm so scared of betrayals and lies and the irreparable break of their relationship, but at the same time? i watched this show for the monsters and the myth arcs and the conflicts, not for the rainbows, the unicorns and the puppies and one of three ain't bad. i think Cas will do something very bad, very disappointing, but Dean will forgive because Dean is a grown-up. grown-ups know that other grown-up Angels fucking up? that's to be expected. in fact, Cas fucking up means he's advanced in his relationship with Dean, because Dean getting fucked over and Dean getting over it is a part and parcel of being in a close relationship in Dean-land. look at his Dad, his brother, even his Mother to a certain extent (sacrificing his children for her hubby)...pls let it be so. *wrings hands*

\o/ i was all thinky-thinky about Jensen's comment on how fan01 could now influence the outcome and the direction of the story, which makes me think of how it was in the time of the Comedias where the actors/writers would adapt and change the script based on audience reaction, what joke flopped, what line tugged at their heart-strings... in other words, it's more like fanfics/WIP's, where there's an immediacy to the interpretation/feedback that isn't there with other types of creative endeavors. i think it's less about recognition than about conversation, which is like, idk? a totally more democratic way of expression.


swan_bite: Anna eating some cotton candy and looking smug about it (Default)

July 2015

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